Just for Sport

Depending on your viewpoint, the first All-English UEFA Final was either a very fortunate or a very unfortunate pairing.  In my mind, it was terrible: The Soccer equivalent of the Red Sox versus the Yankees.  Bandwagon Red Sox fans are only outdone by bandwagon Manchester United fans.  On the other hand, Chelsea’s payroll this year is a whopping $270 million, bringing new meaning to the term "trying to buy a championship." 

Unfortunately for the popularity of soccer in the States, the game was rather unexciting and full of all the stereotypes and excuses that keep Americans from watching the game.  There were two goals in regulation, and they both came in the first half.  Nobody scored in 75 minutes of play.  Edward Van der Sar made a grand total of one save in 120 minutes, yet still ended up on the winning side.  Then there were the referees, who seemed determined to affect the outcome of the game, handing out cards for every mistimed challenge.   Finally, the superstar on each team lived up to their respective bad reputations: Cristiano Ronaldo apparently wanted to set a record for flops in one game, while Didier Drogba showed his maturity by throwing the wussiest slap recorded on television during extra time.

All in all, this was a missed opportunity for a highly visible game to have an impact on America.  Instead, stereotypes have been confirmed in the minds of those who need excuses not to watch.

Most Americans have no idea what this means.  These people will continue to not care after today.